Patrick Swayze is dying and Joanie is crying...

I had no idea he was even sick...but Patrick Swayze has been given just five weeks to live after being diagnosed with pancreatic cancer, a representative for the actor has confirmed.

Swayze starred in Dirty Dancing, the movie that shaped my adolescence. He was my first crush and I always dreamed of a guy teaching me how to dance like that during a summer vacation at Kellerman's.

The National Enquirer first reported Swayze was diagnosed in late January, and the cancer has spread to other parts of his body. A representative confirmed the report to the New York Post.

Swayze, 55, has been travelling to Stanford University's cancer centre with his wife Lisa Niemi for chemotherapy treatments, the Enquirer reported.
An insider said: "He was told he could have two more treatments, but his cancer was not responding. In short - they held out little hope for a cure.
"It's time to start praying for a miracle."
The actor, who made a name for himself in Dirty Dancing and has also starred in Ghost, Point Break and Donnie Darko, is on a liquid diet as he can't keep solids down.
A "very good source" reportedly told blogger Perez Hilton that Swayze had seemed fine on set at his latest movie.
"Patrick has been at rehearsals for a new cheerleading movie at Century City studio frequently lately, and he definitely does not look like he has five more weeks of life left.
"I'm not sure of his medical condition(s), but if he is gravely ill, he is hiding it very well," the source said.
Sufferers of pancreatic cancer typically have a survival rate of less than five per cent.

Mmmmmm...tastes like, poison!! @#$%!!!!

Okay, so I understand Starbucks' desire to market drinks to the weight watching crowd, which I unfortunately have been a part of for most of my entire existance. Starbucks introduced a line of "skinny" or low calorie beverages back in December. These drinks are made with with nonfat milk and sugar-free syrup. Ok, so the non-fat milk I can handle. It's the sugar-free syrup that makes me want to hurl and run for a bottle of Listerine. Other zero-calorie syrup flavors include: Vanilla, Hazelnut, Caramel, and Cinnamon Dolce--all of which taste like, well, poison to me. I would rather spend another 20 minutes on the treadmill and keep some junk in my trunk than drink this. Really, it's where I draw the line--especially when it comes to my coffee.

Pink gets the divorce party started...

Well, this is no surprise to me. They haven't been photographed together is months. I'm not sure how long it's officially been over, but the on-again, off-again couple Pink and motocross racing hubby Carey Hart have decided to call it quits after two years of marriage.
"This decision was made by best friends with a huge amount of love and respect for one another," Pink's representative, Michele Schweitzer, said Tuesday in a statement. "While the marriage is over, their friendship has never been stronger."

Hey, remember Mrs. Garrett??

This is what The Facts of Life actress Charlotte Rae looks like now! I have to admit, I respect her for not cowering to a series of bad plastic surgeries like Joan Rivers. And, at least she's wearing a Burberry jacket!

Pitbull is one tough dawg...

Miami rapper Pitbull is a real G. During a recent performance at a club in San Antonio, some idiot threw a beer bottle at the rapper's head halfway through his second song. He was bleeding and later required stiches. But a fan at the show said 10 minutes later he was back on the stage with blood dripping from his head, holding a blood-soaked towel requesting the guy who hit him to "bring his ass up here so i can whoop his ass." Then Pit broke tore into his latest single, "The Anthem." Never one to want to disappoint his fans, Pitbull is a real trooper and professional performer. Kickass Pit!

Brooke Hogan is coming back to the M.I.A.!

Hulk Hogan's little girl, Brooke, who's now 19, will be moving back to Miami, but this time on her own! Hogan Knows Best will be airing its 5th season on VH1 starting this month. She'll be moving into a penthouse at the Mosaic on Miami Beach. The show will follow the 5-foot-11, ironed body singer around Miami as she goes out on her own without mom, dad and Nick this time.

Every night I hope and pray, a dream lover will come my way. Wake up little Snoozy! Smell the smellin' salts.

You have gotta love Bill Clinton. I mean, anybody that is willing to take this guy seriously at this point has got to be a jackass themselves. While wifey was off battling Obama, Billy boy opened his pie hole again before a packed Sunday service at one of the largest black churches in Washington, D.C. He offered an apology of sorts for racially tinged comments he made about Obama and his candidacy that have triggered a backlash in the black community and among many other Democrats.

Clinton invoked his "worship of a God of second chances." Well if anyone's been given second chances, it's certainly him.

Clinton had been criticized for asserting that Obama's characterization of his position on the Iraq war is a "fairy tale" and for comparing Obama's resounding victory in South Carolina to failed presidential candidate Jesse Jackson's wins there in the '80s.

He also recently fell asleep and had a dream during a January church service honoring Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. on MLK day. The service took place at the Covenant Avenue Baptist Church in Harlem. That's cause the dude is trolling on My Space all night long. Oh, Bill. You are so...predictable.